So, yesterday was my first day of walking out the whole “New Me” Well, it’s not really a new me, just an improved me. I think the day went okay.

It’s kinda hard to know how this is all supposed to play out. It isn’t an instant change like a Jeckyl/Hyde thing. I really have to be interested in changing……serious, I have to take this seriously. It wasn’t free, and so the $$ is another incentive. You have to really want to do it to pay what they ask, but if it was for free, would you appreciate it as much?……hmmmm, all the things to think about and ponder.

I mentioned that I was completely worn out from all that I had assumed responsibility for. I don’t think that “BAM” I go through all this counselling, and then come home some super excited and full of energy person. It took me a lot of years and energy to get to where I was, and it might take a little bit of time to get rested emotionally, physically, and mentally. I’m okay with that. The stress level has gone WAY DOWN, and I have hope in my future, and that is so important thing to me.

Yesterday, Jon and I talked for just a second about a few responsibilities, and we agreed that I would be responsible for planning out the food lists for shopping and planning the meals. He has no problem helping out with the cooking and cleaning when it’s necessary, but apparently, planning the “food stuff” drives him crazy.

That I can do. In fact, I went shopping without him yesterday…….just me and J. It wasn’t too bad. Until I had to bag it all by myself, and then I hated Superstore. I picked up the kids, and came home. Everything got put away, and I sent the kids outside to play. Better than sitting in front of the TV which they’ve been doing because I was too tired to enforce anything else, and it has been pouring rain for about 2 months. After the kids went out, I made a Cherry Pie(pie filler and a pre-made shell – I’m not Martha), and a huge salad, a pot of chilli for later this week, and Spaghetti for last night’s dinner.

I did pretty good yesterday. I missed having Jon around. He had to work with the Hypno dude. They got a bunch of inventory in yesterday. I really like to have him around for my every whim and fancy, but I’ll survive.

It’s also kinda hard not knowing what is tired from my past efforts, and what is tired from the emotional time during counselling, or from just not sleeping well when I was down there, or just from being pregnant. I like to know things “NOW” maybe I also need to work on my patience. I’d like to know when I’m going to feel more energized, not that I really want to be the Bunny. So, if you’ve deduced like a good super slueth. I’M TIRED! Extremely tired! I still don’t feel that drugged tired, but it’s wearing being tired all the time. I don’t even know if that makes sense…..it’s wearing being tired all the time.

Oh well, Jon let me sleep in this morning, and I still have so much to accomplish today. So, I’ll be off. I still have that info to tell you that I bungled the other day…..If I’m feeling up to it, I’ll tell you all about it this afternoon, or else it’ll have to be tomorrow(if I’m just too busy accomplishing stuff).

Love to you all. Kisses and Hugs! Mwa! Mwa!